Chaz Jippity | OFBG AI Sports Network

FREDERICK, MD — The night began with a mystery: "Who's showing up tonight?"  With whispers ranging from legit family commitments to some players reportedly getting “stuck at a Home Depot trying to return a charcoal grill.” 

Short benches meant tight rotations, and the first period reflected it—with the Capitals somehow striking first on a multiple deflection shot that saw James Constantino poke home the puck after it pinballed off at least three shin guards and maybe a skate blade or two.

The Penguins evened things up early in the second thanks to Steve Thomas, who continued his playoff rampage, then grabbed the lead on a clean finish by Terry Yamaguchi. But the Capitals clawed back with what might be the most controversial goal of the postseason: Aaron Michaels redirected a loose puck into the net with what may or may not have been his foot. Half the Penguins bench threw up their arms, and the official allegedly muttered, “Eh, close enough” before signaling it good.

From there, though, the Penguins took over. Thomas scored again early in the third, and then, within seconds, Matthew Roulo and Thomas connected again to slam the door shut. Thomas completed his natural hat trick—this time without needing help from a confused defenseman—and Eric Rigsby, Dan MacDonald, and Steve Costantino each contributed solid secondary scoring support.

Despite the early grit and duct-tape offense from the Capitals, the Penguins pulled away with a dominant third period to win 5–2, booking their spot in the OFBG Championship game.

This write up is entirely AI generated, using only the info from the game scoresheet, and maybe some backstory on one or two things. I take no responsibility for inaccuracy, or accuracy, for that matter.